Symptoms of true love

Symptoms of True Love.

This post is about one of the symptoms of true love toward God, not romantic relationship. It’s about giving up everything to Christ.

There’s a famous cartoon of Garfield the Cat hanging with his two front paws on a clothesline wire. The caption reads, “When all else fails, hang in there!

Symptoms of true love is the final part of a series, “5 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned as a Cancer Patient.” You can access the introduction here. Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 here.  Find Part 4 here.

This Garfield cartoon fits a man with cancer. We never know the future. All of life and the precious things we’ve worked so hard for could be pulled away from us in an instant or a few weeks. There’s nothing we can do about it. We begin to understand more fully what’s important in life and what isn’t. Money, time, even friends and family are fleeting.

All we can do is hang onto God with our two front paws. When all else dissolves, God is still there.

For me, I have to give up everything and lay back on the chest of Christ. Family hopes fade. Ministry dreams evaporate. But love remains—His love to me and mine toward Him. I have ministry goals: I want to see people saved and healed. I want to see lives changed and His kingdom come. I want to see the church built up and become more influential in the community.

But I have cancer. I have to give it all up. All I want is to love God. I will let Him determine my ministry. I have no other choice. Nor do I want anything else. I am His and He is mine. This attitude is one of he symptoms of true love. And that’s the way it should be from the beginning.

“Not My Will, But Thine Be Done.”

Tony Reinke over at the Desiring God website has a quote from Tim Keller that helps define and identify one of the symptoms of true love. “Suffering is actually at the heart of the Christian story.”

Am I willing to give it all up to Jesus?

Are you willing to suffer for Jesus sake? Am I?

What’s so Important about Kids Memory Verses?

Kids memory verses–those I learned as a child–helped me go through the torment of chemotherapy. Here’s what I found.

This is part 4 of a series, “5 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned as a Cancer Patient.” Read the introduction here.

Part 1, “Who are the Majestic Ones?” is found here. Part 2, “What to say to a Sick Man?” is practical and something everyone needs to know. Part 3, “Love Doesn’t Let Anyone Go to Hell” will grip anyone with a heart.

It’s rough to have cancer. It’s rough to go through Chemo-therapy treatments. Chemo changes a human body and mind. Digestion, sleep patterns, energy levels, almost everything changes as those chemicals take up bodily residence. I have spent plenty of sleepless nighttime hours.  What’s a person to do hour after hour of drug induced sleeplessness?

The best idea is to meditate on Scripture. That’s where kids memory verses like Psalm 23 saved the day. (Or should I say, saved the night?) I don’t want to turn on the lights and get totally awake by reading something. Meditation on Psalms or other Bible verses can relax and induce sleep. But how can a person meditate on verses he’s never committed to memory? No way; the Scripture has to be learned in advance of the crisis.

My Great Discovery

The Psalms and other verses I’d learned as a child returned; the verses or chapters I’d memorized as an adult slipped so easily away. I was surprised about this. Normally, we’d think what we learned most recently would be most retained. In fact, the opposite was true. I knew it was easier to memorize as a child, but I was unprepared in my hours of need to recall the verses I’d memorized as an adult. John 3:16, Psalm 46 and other verses came back but only because I’d committed them to memory in my childhood.

What’s the “take home”?

Parents, do yourself and your children a favor by teaching kids memory verses now before their minds get cluttered with the affairs of life. Sunday School teachers and Children’s Church workers, do the same. Teach the children whose parents never come to church verses about God’s love and salvation through Christ. You never know—some of those verses may return in hours of suffering or crises during adult years.

I’m saying it again.  I learned this as a cancer patient. These simple kids memory verses carried me through the nights of chemo-induced torment. You will never regret teaching Bible memory verses, nor will they!

This is Part 2 of a 5 part series. Read the introduction here.

Read Part 1 “Who are the Majestic Ones?” here.

Here’s something practical, down-to-earth, and just plain helpful. ” What to say to a sick man?” This can be important for evangelism too.

Nearly everyone wants to help, but how? Most of us struggle to find words when we meet someone who is sick or going through a crisis. I admit that up until now my most common response has been to say, “I’m sorry.”  I was doing my best to empathize with the hurting. But since I got cancer I’ve discovered that to say, “I’m sorry” doesn’t help much. It just leaves me in my condition. What I need is hope and lots of it! I found that any attempt at hope, even suggestions for crazy alternative therapies, offers some hope.

Teachings don’t help much either. Sick men don’t need teaching; we need faith.

What should a person say to a sick guy? The best response I found is for someone to come along side, listen and humbly ask, “What can I do to help?” Who knows? Maybe the need is a ride? Or meals for the family? Or help to change a light bulb?

Flynn is a young and single father whose daughter Riley had a dramatic bout with a cancerous brain tumor. Riley survived the surgery with eighty-eight stitches in her head. Flynn mentioned something I had recently taught the church. “I really appreciated what you taught the other day. You said, “Don’t say, ‘I’m sorry’ to people who are hurting. That doesn’t help. What we need is encouragement, not sympathy.”

Think about it. “What can I do to help?” or “How can I help you?” These questions show humility on our part. No need to guess or assume what someone else needs. These questions place the sick man in the driver’s seat. They show respect to the sick. They empower the person who’s hurting and allow him or her to express his own needs. And who knows better than anyone what’s the need of the moment than the sick man himself?

5 Life-changing Lessons I learned as a Cancer Patient

Click here to read the introduction “You Have Cancer!”

My wife, Kari, and some of our children stood on either side of me as I announced to our church that I had cancer. When we sat down, the entire church immediately gathered around us and started ministering to us in faith and prayer. They didn’t hesitate one bit. One lady, Sherry, who is herself a cancer survivor, announced with unmitigated faith and passion, “Christ is a big “C”; cancer is a little “c”! There I was, a broken man, and the whole church was standing as one in staunch faith and love.

Who are the majestic ones? “As for the saints who are in the earth, they are the majestic ones in whom is all my delight” (Psalm 16). The church of the Living Water has stood by me like an immoveable rock throughout the duration of my chemotherapy treatments. If I didn’t know it before (and I did) I know it now—the saints of God, the church, are the majestic ones in all the earth.

My wife and family, each and every son and daughter, are giving me unwavering assistance throughout this trial. They are majestic in my eyes.

My fellow pastors in Muscatine have rallied to my benefit. God has heard prayers from the pulpits of nearly every church in town. Baptist, Methodist, Vineyard, non-denominational, and so on, they have all prayed for me. These are a majestic band of brothers.

“A brother in need is a brother indeed.” The aphorism is true. Crisis reveals our true friends. Nor should anyone be surprised that Christian people are salient in the mercy department. Every believer in Jesus Christ has received His mercy. It’s only natural that we pass it on.

It’s common in some quarters to criticize the church in America. Yet when the chips are down, who is the greatest support group anywhere? Unbelievers need to know there is an assembly of “Good Samaritans” ready and willing to help in time of need. God bless the church!

“You Have Cancer!” (Introduction to 5 Life-changing Lessons I Learned from Cancer)

Who Are the Majestic Ones? (Part 1)

What to Say to a Sick Man (Part 2)

Love Doesn’t Let Anyone Go to Hell (Part 3)

Why Teach Kids Memory Verses (Part 4)

Loving God (Part 5)

 “You Have Cancer”

The doctor was firm but gentle when he spoke to me the fateful words, “Your lungs are filled with cancer.” He went on to say this particular cancer was inoperable. Of course, I was shocked; we all were.

As a pastor and counselor, I knew the first stage of grief is denial. Well, I was in denial for some days. I couldn’t believe I had cancer. (After all, I was chopping wood and riding bicycle. I could ride up hills just as well as some of my adult children!) Dr. G., who first discovered the abnormality in my lungs from a CAT scan, had quizzed me in a way that should have prepared me for the dire diagnosis.

“Do you smoke?’

“No!”

Have you ever smoked?”

No.”

“Have you been around a lot of second hand smoke?”

“No.”

“Well, cancer has its own mind. Some people who smoke all their lives don’t get it and some people who never smoke do get it. I’m sending you to a cancer specialist.”

Following exploratory surgery, the cancer specialist later ameliorated his grim diagnosis to something happier. “You have lymphoma which has settled in your lungs. This is very unusual.” He went on to say that lymphoma is treatable and the survival rate is greater than for lung cancer.

If need be, I’m ready to die. I have received Jesus Christ as my Savior from the guilt of my sin. According to God’s Word, I am secure in His love and forgiveness and will be with Him when I die. In the meantime, I will try to beat this thing by the power of God and the prayers of His people. That’s my confidence in God and His Word. If I do die, I don’t want to die of cancer. I believe if someone is going to die, they should die healthy!

I have endured six chemo-therapy treatments. I don’t wish these treatments on anybody, but I realize God has used chemo to save my life, at least temporarily. Without treatment I would be a “goner” by now. Instead, I’m gaining strength and feeling better week by week. Praise God!

There’s got to be a reason for all this suffering. May I share 5 life-changing lessons I’ve already learned as a cancer patient? Blogs in this series “5 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned as a Cancer Patient” tell the stories.

On April 5, 2011 18 murders were committed in Iowa.  All took place at 2751 Tech Dr., Bettendorf, IA 52722.  The murders were done systematically, one at a time.  Records were kept of who did it, but none of the individuals involved have been charged.  All the victims were children, which makes these murders in Iowa even more egregious.

Who were the perpetrators of these ghastly events?  The Planned Parenthood doctors and staff performed the actual killings.

But wait. . .to tell it like it is, you and I were responsible, at least in part.  We have not sufficiently mourned over the killing of infants this close to our homes.

There’s a parallel recorded in the ninth chapter of Ezekiel in in the Bible.  The LORD said to him, “Go through the midst of the city. . . and put a mark on the foreheads of the men who sigh and groan over all the abominations which are being committed in its midst.” (Ezekiel 9:4)  It turns out  those who grieved over the terrible acts of that day were marked with the sign of a tau, a Hebrew letter written like a cross at that time.  Those who got the mark were spared from death; the others not.

Killing of innocent children is our present day abomination.

We, “good people” all, were accessories to these murders because we have not mourned sufficiently.  We have also voted for such men as Dave Loebsack, Bruce Braley, and US Senator Tom Harkin.  Loebsack represents Iowa’s Second District and Bruce Braley, Iowa’s First District. These elected officials repeatedly use their legislative powers to promote the culture of death in our state and in our nation.  They justify murder by hiding behind the “reproductive ‘rights’ of women.”  We, the “good citizens” of America, have also elected a president who is so callous that he voted to withhold life-saving nutrition from children who survived botched abortions.

A Spirit-filled person stands for life!  The Bible says, “You shall receive power after the Holy Spirit comes upon you.” (Acts 1:8)  The power of God’s love is growing in the nation.  Seventy-one percent (71%) of Americans now oppose tax-funded abortion.  We are winning, but the battle rages.  The Spirit-filled life evinces grief over sin and love toward the enemies of life.  The Spirit energizes those He fills to stand for life, lobby for life, and produce life in our own marriages and families.

There’s blood on our doorstep. But thank God, the Spirit is moving in our land.  How long the blood stains remain depends in part on you and me.